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Dale Rockwell

Category Archives: Anger

He Can’t Read Your Mind!

29 Thursday Sep 2016

Posted by dalerockwell in Anger, Husband, Marriage

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Anger, Husband, Marriage

You see dirty dishes piled high, baskets full of laundry (some clean and some dirty- and you’re just hoping you can tell the difference), stinky kids who need baths, bills to be paid, and kids’ homework that hasn’t even been looked at yet.

He sees TV!

You see groceries you bought two days ago still sitting on the counter and a dog staring at you waiting to go for a walk. And don’t even talk about the dog poop you see in the backyard!

He sees TV!

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And you are left thinking things like this (although probably not this genteel):

  • “What is the matter with him?”
  • “Is he blind?”
  • “Can’t he see how busy I am?”
  • “Why doesn’t he get off that stupid couch and help out around here?”

You see a lazy good-for-nothing husband!

He sees TV!

As a wife of 40+ years, let me tell you a secret:

He doesn’t see it and he can’t read your mind!

I know this is hard to believe and accept.  It actually seems incredible. But it’s true!

The sooner you believe your husband doesn’t ‘see’ like you, the sooner you can start taking steps to make your marriage better. If you can’t accept this truth, your frustration and bitterness is only going to increase until you finally explode. And when you explode, your husband will be shocked and wonder where ‘that’ came from. And then he will be bitter against you. And thus it begins – the road of bitterness that leads to more distance, anger and emotional separation.

A couple of preliminary steps to take:

  1. First, take a good look at yourself. What do you see? Do you see frustration and anger? Do you see jealousy and bitterness? Do you see distance growing?
  2. Second, ask yourself what it is that you really want. Do you want help? Or perhaps there’s more to it than that. Perhaps you want to know that he really cares about you?

After you’ve answered these questions honestly, you will be ready to take the next steps toward a better more intimate marriage. And isn’t that what we all want?

(To be continued…)

Oh and by the way, it’s probably a very good thing that he can’t read your mind! Just sayin’!

 

 

 

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Are you kidding me?!?!

29 Friday Jan 2016

Posted by dalerockwell in Anger, Choice, Faith

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Anger, Choice, Faith

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Sometimes I am so bewildered by the things other people do.  I just don’t get why they do the things they do!  And I don’t understand why they make such stupid choices!  And to top it all off, these things have a huge impact on MY life! And I wonder if these people ever even thought about how their decisions might impact those around them, especially ME!

When these times come, they are hurtful!

When these times comes, they are scary!

When these times come, they are discouraging!

When these times come, what then?

  1. First, tell it ALL to Jesus (as often as you need to).
  2. Second, choose to forgive and pray for those ‘stupid’ people (even if you don’t feel like it).
  3. Third, keep on trusting God:
    1. Trust that He is ultimately in control of all things (even if it doesn’t seem like it).
    2. Trust that He has your best interest at heart (even if others’ don’t).
    3. Trust that He is at work and He will work this for your good (even if you can’t possibly see how).
  4. Fourth, keep your eyes on Jesus (not on those around you).
  5. Fifth, keep on doing what God has called you to do (and forget about all the other stuff).

But in all these things, we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us!  Romans 8:37

Philippians 2:12-14, Romans 8:18-39

Let it Go!

12 Monday Jan 2015

Posted by dalerockwell in Anger, Forgiveness

≈ 1 Comment

It happens!  Someone says or does something that hurts you.  You feel insignificant, unappreciated, and disrespected.  And almost spontaneously, that pain morphs into anger. And this precise moment is a devil of an opportunity.

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Ephesians 4:26 says “Be angry and yet do not sin;”

How I respond to this devil of an opportunity determines whether or not the devil has an opportunity.  Ephesians 4:27

If I hang on to my anger, I will use my words to tear down and destroy. I will create an uproar.  I will slander.  I will harbor ill will and secretly watch for a chance to get even.  I will nurture and cherish my bitterness. I will stay front and center.

If I let go of my anger, I will use my words to build up and edify.  I will create unity.  I will speak well of the one who hurt me.  I will forgive.  I will be tender-hearted.  I will put others front and center.

If you’ve been deeply hurt, you know how difficult it is to let the anger go;  And the deeper the hurt, the harder it is to let go.

In the middle of the passage about anger is the following verse:

Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God.  Ephesians 4:30

Forgiveness happens only when we say ‘Yes’ to the prompting of the Holy Spirit. When He says, “Let it go!”, say ‘Yes’.  And keep saying ‘yes’.  He will do through you what you are unable to do yourself.

The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control.  Galatians 5:22-23

We are in a spiritual battle, not with the people around us, but against the spiritual forces of wickedness.  So do not give the devil an opportunity.  Instead, give God an opportunity to work in you.  Trust Him to work this for your good. Ephesians 6:10-12, Romans 8:26-30

Recent Posts

  • Gratitude is more than Attitude
  • Being Still is Hard Work
  • A Great Marriage Doesn’t Just Happen
  • He Can’t Read Your Mind!
  • Get in the Chase!

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Recent Posts

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  • He Can’t Read Your Mind!
  • Get in the Chase!

Recent Comments

gmdoore@myfairpoint.… on Being Still is Hard Work
dalerockwell on He Can’t Read Your …
rmschoener@comcast.n… on He Can’t Read Your …
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Gail on He Can’t Read Your …

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Categories

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Recent Posts

  • Gratitude is more than Attitude
  • Being Still is Hard Work
  • A Great Marriage Doesn’t Just Happen
  • He Can’t Read Your Mind!
  • Get in the Chase!

Recent Comments

gmdoore@myfairpoint.… on Being Still is Hard Work
dalerockwell on He Can’t Read Your …
rmschoener@comcast.n… on He Can’t Read Your …
dalerockwell on He Can’t Read Your …
Gail on He Can’t Read Your …

Archives

  • November 2020
  • October 2016
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  • March 2016
  • February 2016
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  • December 2015
  • September 2015
  • June 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015

Categories

  • Anger
  • Change
  • Children
  • Choice
  • Church
  • Compassion
  • Despair
  • Doubt
  • Encouragement
  • Endurance
  • Envy
  • Faith
  • Faithfulness
  • Faitih
  • Fear
  • Forgiveness
  • Future
  • Gift
  • God's Will
  • God's Word; Bible
  • Gospel
  • Grace
  • Gratitude
  • Greed
  • Grief
  • Grow
  • Grumbling
  • Heart
  • Heaven
  • Help
  • Hope
  • Hunger
  • Husband
  • Joy
  • Knowledge
  • Learn
  • Love
  • Loved Ones
  • Marriage
  • Meaning of Life
  • Money
  • Need
  • Opportunity
  • Pain
  • Parenting
  • Plans
  • Power
  • Praise
  • Prayer
  • Purpose
  • Reflection
  • Respect
  • Rest
  • Safety
  • Security
  • Strength
  • Teach
  • Thankfulness
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